# Mr. R.’s World of Math

## Page 1: My Students are Lasagna

So here’s a story you’re probably not going to believe, but it’s true. I promise you! At least I remember it happening…
It was a long time ago, when I was teaching in a school that was a bit strange, and a bit peculiar (but not nearly as peculiar and strange as the school you’re in right now!)

As I remember, it was a cold, dark morning, and I came into my classroom just like I always did. I took out my planning book and wrote spelling quiz’ for 8:30.

(I always say it’s good to start the day with a spelling quiz!  Don’t you?)

Anyway, this week’s spelling words had to do with food, and I began to write them on a list to prepare for the quiz, but as I was writing the words, something spooky happened. I saw a shadow moving over my desk. There was something sneaking up behind me!
I spun around and saw a strange looking person. The strange looking person looked exactly like me! (and that’s pretty strange). The next thing I knew he raised a finger and a beam shot out of it. For a second I felt as if I was falling, and then I looked around. Everything seemed huge, but I quickly realized it was because I had shrunk! I was only 1 inch tall.

The imposter, who looked like me, picked me up in his hand and laughed. “I’m the Evil Alien Mr. R., and I’m gonna’ lock you in this little cage and put you on your desk. Then you’re gonna’ watch as I turn your students into food and take them back to my planet to eat them for lunch!”

“Are you nutty?  Are you bonkers? You will do none of those things! Now change me back to my full size! How do you think you can turn my students into food anyway?”
“Oh, you’ll see,” said the Evil, Alien Mr. R., “and there will be nothing you can do about it! Even if you scream, you’re too tiny to be heard!” Then he dropped me into the little cage, and locked the cover!

I actually did scream for the next 29 minutes. If I screamed 46 times each minute, how many times had I screamed in total?

Enter the number of screams here (no commas):