Mr. R.’s World of Math

the doctor

mine works at the hospital...

There I was,
Sitting and waiting,
In doc’s office,
After ice-skating…

My mother,
She’d taken me home,
I’d fallen,
She’d figured,
I’d broken a bone…

I have to admit,
My doc is real nice,
But can’t this be cured,
With aspirin and ice?
“No,” said my mom,
“This needs attention,”
So there we waited,
With cool apprehension…
Finally, finally the door of the office,
Swung open wide,
Like the claws of a crawfish…

And there was my doctor,
But he didn’t say, “Hi,”
He smiled and looked,
And then said,”goodbye!”
“Goodbye?” asked my mom,
“But you didn’t examine!”
“I don’t need to,” said Doc,
“He’s a perfect Red salmon,
Or is he trout,
Or a bass,
Or big ol’ sunfish?
In a dish we could bake him,
Is what I do wish…”
“Are you crazy doc?
Have you been up too late?”
Asked my mother,
In a way that sounded irate…
“Up too late? Crazy?
None of those things,
I see he’s so healthy!
Come look at these rings,
Under his eyes….
And his yellowish shade!!!
This boy is so healthy,
He sure makes the grade!!
What makes you think,
This boy needs a check-up?
He’s the picture of health,
At least from the neck-up!”
My mother screamed,
Just look at his arm!!!
I think it’s broken,”
She sounded alarmed…
The doctor sniffed hard,
And turned with a grin,
Arm smells perfect,
And so does his skin…”

“Smells!” screamed my Mom,
“No-how, and no-way!
Is there a real doctor,
At this office today?”
“No,” said my doctor,
As he bit my arm hard,
I screamed, “Ow, that hurts,”
He said,
“Tasty like lard!”

Mom was upset,
She grabbed my good arm,
Said Doc needed time,
To rest at the farm…
“I think doc’s gone mad,
He needs one I think,
Not a medical doctor,
But some sort of shrink…”
So we left his doc office,
Muy pronto – with haste,
Mom built me a cast,
With water and paste…
My arm soon healed,
It felt really fine,
Now mom’s my doctor,
All of the time…

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