Mr. R.’s World of Math

Page 2: The Snack-Witch

“Well, even one piece of popcorn isn’t light enough to float,” I said as we stared at the floating popcorn in amazement. As we watched, the bag started to shake and wiggle, and finally it popped open and we saw something fly out of it. It flew in mid-air as the snack bag dropped onto Jake’s desk.
“What! Who are you?” I asked. 
snack witch“I’m a snack-witch. What did you think I was?” she said.
“What’s a snack-witch, and what are you doing in my classroom?” I asked.
“Snack-witches live in every snack. All the chips, pretzels, chocolate bars, raisins, and  every other snack you’ve ever eaten. You just never see us,” she said.
“You mean we eat witches?” asked Jenna, “Ewwwww!”
“No, we fly away before you can eat us. We always have to get to the next bag of snacks before someone opens them!”
“If that’s true, why have we never seen snack-witches flying around?” asked Carlos. 
“Because we’re usually invisible to humans.”
“But, we can see you?” said Matthew.
“It appears that something in that blue gas I was breathing made me visible to humans.”
“I don’t believe any of this,” said Jake.
“Yeah, said Eva, “What’s the purpose of snack-witches anyway?”
“It’s not about purpose!” said the snack-witch, “Many years ago, I think it was the year 1024, a witch like me stole all the snacks from a farmer she didn’t like. wizard cartoonShe didn’t know the farmer was chief of all wizards, and he placed a curse on witches. That curse is to put us next to delicious snacks every moment of our lives.”
“What’s wrong with that?” asked Eva.
“What’s wrong with that! What’s wrong with that!! We can’t eat any of the snacks is what’s wrong with that! The curse prevents us from opening our mouths. Luckily for me, the blue gas enabled me to open my mouth again. This is the first time I’ve been able to speak in over a thousand years!” she yelled.
“That’s a long time not to be able to eat and talk,” I said.
“It sure is, and now that I can open my mouth again, I’m going to eat ALL of your snacks and everything else I can find in this classroom. I’ve got one thousand years of hunger going on!”
“No way!” yelled Jenna, “You can’t eat our snacks! They might be terrible, but they’re better than nothing!”
“You’re not going to stop me!” she said as she laughed an evil witch’s laugh and took out some sort of magic wandy thingy.
“What’s that?” I asked as she waved the wand at us.
glueAt first we didn’t feel anything, but then we realized we were not only stuck to our chairs, we also couldn’t open our mouths! We couldn’t get up or speak.  

I tried to stand up 3,451 times, and my students tried to stand up 1,789 times. How many more times did I try to stand up than my students?

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